Growing up, I was never the one that my friends would run to when they have problems. I'd be the one they'd call when they're bored and need someone to tell them jokes and stories and cheer them up. I'm also the one who would choose to stay away from the source of the drama especially when I am starting to get dragged in the situation. So when friendship related drama is right in front of me, it's always a fight or flight situation. As a young person who needs to vocalize everything I needed to let out, would always fight, try to get everything fixed, smooth everything out.
I don't know why I thought of this today. Maybe as a reminder to keep my guard up or maybe it's my subconscious telling me I need to socialize more. Either way, my guards will remain up and know that I'm lucky that I have my husband, my family and my closest friends to vent out to and tell me if I'm being silly or too serious.